Hey beautiful people! I was sitting with my friend recently in a Starbucks getting work done. She commented on all the people around and it reminded me of a subject I’ve all often thought about but never written on. I believe we frequently run into others with the understanding that they have their own lives but don’t fully appreciate the full richness & beauty of what that means. Statistically speaking, the vast majority of people want to get married at some point in their lives. This is good but what exactly does marriage look like? Marriage means growing continually closer to another person, partnering to do life together, accepting them faults and all, and knowing them as much as is possible on earth. There is no form of relationship quite like marriage and it often exhibits characteristics that defy human rationale.
What is specifically curious about the topic though, is that what draws us to a marriage type of relationship is the desire to be known, truly known, by another human. Furthermore, even in a marriage, the deepest, richest form of relationship we have, we still can never “fully” know anyone else. Each and every person thinks and reasons because of how their minds & personalities have developed. We are all unique not exclusively because of our individual personalities, although that is a big part of it, but because of the individual experiences and choices we have made along the way to bring us to right now. The traumas we’ve gone through, people in our lives, places we’ve been, cultures we’ve experienced, and everything else in between have brought us too today.
Let that sink in for a moment. If you’re anything like me, your parents probably told you there is nobody just like you in this world, you are one in a million. That is completely true, but can we even comprehend the propensity of this statement? For all the selfishness we often feel there are near eight billion other people all with their own histories and traumas, dreams, and hurts.
So, as I sit and write in a Starbucks, walk through a busy airport, or stand in a crowded arena… Sometimes it just hits me, and I can’t help but appreciate that each and every single person around me has their very own story. Each and every one of us has a life that could fill volumes of books. Just think, you could probably fill multiple books just on the thoughts, feelings, and experiences you have in a single day! I like to think in terms of books, so to continue the trend, imagine a book was written about each day of your life. If you lived to 75, that’s 27,000 books just about your life. Now blow that figure up just to the people you consider your close friends, and we start to appreciate just how incredible of a feat it is that we really know anyone. Looking around at all the people mulling about anywhere it’s easy to forget that each one is going somewhere, coming from somewhere, experiencing joys and sorrows, healing and hurt. Every one of us has a library of our story. Who in our lives truly cares are not more evident than when we examine who wants to read us.
You, friend, are of indescribable value. If someone is not willing to read your story that doesn’t mean they are a bad person. But you must appreciate the gravitas of who you are, who you’re becoming, and where you have been. People can and will walk in and out of your life as long as you live. But who is truly worth your time can be found by looking at who really wants to know you. Not the superficial, small talk that rules our day-to-day life. Ask yourself who wants to sit with you and truly read the story of you. You are so valuable and deserve people in your life that want to know the intricacies of who you are. What gets you out of bed in the morning, what are your hopes, dreams, struggles, and fears? Not to say that we should write off people that are not willing to go deep with us, but realize your value and appreciate who is willing to take the time to appreciate you. Prioritize your life accordingly. The people that deserve the most of your time are the ones that truly are willing to give their all to your relationship.
Time is a precious, finite, non-renewable resource. Once it’s gone, you can’t rewind the clock. All that to say, you need to prioritize who in your life deserves the most of your time? Whose time do you want to take to read their story and who wants your time to read your story? Better yet, there is a feeling of accomplishment when you finish reading a book. Magnify that to the level of our relationships with others and every day we have the opportunity to read someone else. Don’t let this become obsession, others are not simply “books to read” but we all have a story, and we have the opportunity to author each other’s.
Remember, friend, you are of incredible, indescribable value!
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